You may be wondering where my videos have gone. One minute I was uploading daily vlogs and the next I seemed to just…disappear. I didn’t do a long explanation on my Instagram or Twitter like I first intended to. I kind of just stopped uploading. Which is why I thought I’d write this blog post to explain why I’m taking a little break from YouTube. Sorry if this post is a little all over the place, I just want to get everything down and am probably not going to consider what order I put everything in.
First of all…
I’ve been receiving quite a few messages asking where I’ve gone and where my videos are. But the most common question has actually been ‘are you okay?’ Which has really touched me. I think the most special thing about my YouTube channel is that my viewers don’t just watch because they care about what concealer I’ve bought, but because they actually relate to me.
Thank you to you
I want to say thank you to everyone who has contacted me. I totally appreciate it was a little out of the blue that my videos stopped. I totally get that you were expecting a vlog last Tuesday and you never got one. I really do appreciate each and every message I receive. So thank you!!
The main thing to address here is that I haven’t stopped making videos. I haven’t deleted my channel and I aren’t going to stop making videos. I just want you to know that. I’m just taking a break… not disappearing forever.
(Here is me drinking a latte in one of my fave coffee spots. I’ll be doing lots of this in my mini break!)
My old videos have gone…
If you go on my channel now, you’ll see that I have made over half of my videos private. You’ll only find videos that I’m either really proud of, that have been particularly popular or that I feel comfortable sharing.
You’ll probably be shocked to hear that almost all of my weekly vlogs are gone, my daily vlogs and the majority of my ‘main channel’ videos.
I have been lucky enough to have never received any hate on my videos. I have had the odd negative comment but never anything that has actually got to me, which is great I guess!
Also, I have an amazing set of viewers that support me and every video I make. It amazes me that even one person watches my videos, let alone hundreds. I want to make it clear that me taking a break has absolutely nothing to do with my viewers, y’all great!!!
The reason I’m taking a break
Okay, here is the actual reason I am taking a break and the reason my old videos are now private.
I’ve only recently I’ve realised that I want to be a little more private. I don’t really want people knowing what I’m doing day in day out, which contradicts my weekly vlogs. I don’t really want people to know about my relationship, which is why I’ve taken down all the vlogs with Ben. I don’t really want people knowing about my personal life…it’s personal, yanno’.
The other day, I felt so overwhelmed at how much I’ve actually shared online. Although I don’t share as much as some YouTubers, I still feel like shared more than I’m comfortable with. In a panic, I went on my channel and made a ton of my videos private. It was a bit of an impulsive thing, but I’m kind of glad I’ve done it. I know my videos bring joy to hundreds of people and I’m sorry if you’re a little gutted reading this post, but I just want to keep private with my personal stuff from now on.
When I’ll start uploading again
If I’m completely honest, I don’t know when the next video I’ll upload will be. I’ll keep you updated on my Instagram. It won’t be too long, don’t think you’ll be waiting until 2019 or anything. I just need a couple of weeks out.
The weekly vlogs are stopping…
Im not actually sure if people are interested in my weeklys or not. Although I get comments and messages about how much my weekly vlogs are adored, I don’t feel like they’re actually that entertaining. For example, when I watch Zoe Suggs vlogs, she is always doing something exciting. I actually want to watch her life because it’s filled with fun stuff and to be frank, she inspires me. On a day to day basis, I don’t feel like my life is very vlog-worthy! I’m not often proud of my weekly vlogs, I never finish the edit and think ‘aaah I am so pleased with that!’. Normally I find myself trying to find time to vlog, which means they’re not the best they could be if I had more time. This month I set myself a target of two videos a week which, to be completely honest, was a little unachievable. I am out of the house most of the day working, I spend half my weekends away with my boyfriend and making quality videos is impossible when you’re hardly at home! So I’ve decided to stop weekly vlogging!
Where I want my channel to go
I want to focus on telling you guys about beauty and fashion. I have managed to move away from videos about my favourite products and my recent purchases. I seem to have been concentrating on vlogging, which isn’t where I want my channel to go. I want to tell you guys about which TV programmes and books I’m loving. I want to tell you which lipstick stays on all day. I want to tell you about the new clothes I’ve bought at Primark!!
The last thing…
I really hope you understand my reasonings as to why I’m taking a break and cutting out the weekly vlogs. I’m sure you will, you guys are amazing and always so supportive. I’ll be posting on here in the meantime so if you want a bit of Leah in your life, I’ll be here, posting!
I need a bit of time for me. I am going to be spending lots of time with my loved ones, time on my own too to get re-motivated and inspired. I want to aim to film what I want to, not what I think I ‘have to’.